What I’m Doing When I’m Doing the Dishes

It’s about the dishes.

But it’s also not about the dishes.

The dishes benefit.

Me, not always so much. Same goes for those around me.

 

There are times when keeping busy, being task-focused and immersing myself in the myth of productivity is all I can do from facing whatever it is I can’t.

(Edit: Whatever it is I haven’t the courage to face)

I might be upset about something.

Chances are I’m caught up in a loop of negative self-talk.

(Edit: I am for sure caught in a web of negative self-talk)

Not every time I’m doing the dishes, though. Sometimes they just need to be done, and not everything fits in the dishwasher.

Let’s take this opportunity to expand the range of what I’m talking about here:

  • General household domestic activities.
  • Putting on washing.
  • Hanging clothes on the line.
  • Vacuuming.
  • Cleaning surface tops.
  • Putting stuff away.

Doing the weekly grocery shop, filling and unpacking the trolley meticulously.

Getting home and putting all my purchases in their proper place, meticulously.

All the while there’s some broken record in my head going over and over and over how hard I have it, how much I have to do, how little appreciation there is for all I do.

It goes on like this and it gets hard to stop.

So, no, I don’t want to talk.

I don’t want to talk because I’m afraid of what I might say.

I’ll snap for sure.

I’ll whinge.

I’ll be all like poor little old me and I hate being like that.

I know my thoughts aren’t rational, aren’t right. But I can’t get my thinking all ironed out inside, so whatever I say it will come out all muddled and I’ll be misunderstood.

Please, just leave me alone.

But don’t leave me alone.

I want to be on my own.

But I need to know you want me around.

Confused?

Join the club.

Somehow this stuff bottlenecks around Friday evenings if I’ve let it get out of control.

I’ve written off whole weekends by my inability to get outside of my own head.

Not so much the last year or two, though I’m prone to the odd afternoon, or maybe even day of intense self-loathing mixed with an overwhelming sense of importance all tied together with feeling completely ignored and unseen as I move about my day to day life.

So, I do the dishes.

I pour my energy and my focus into being productive.

Getting stuff done.

Showing others, no matter how badly I feel, I can still do, still function, still be a man and keep my domain together.

Sometimes, I just do the dishes because they need to be done.

Good luck figuring out which reason is which if you ever catch me elbow deep in suds at a sink!

Ep5 – Maxine Fawcett

Maxine

Ep5.

Choosing to live a creative live means you HAVE TO be ready to commit to whatever it is you want to produce.

Whether it’s painting or sculpture or movies, or for me, podcasts, you have to be prepared to push through the tough times. When it’s tough and we still turn up to create, we’re making a statement about how important what we do is to us.

My guest on this episode of What I Don’t Talk About @ BBQs turns up each and every day, no matter what. Maxine Fawcett is a writer, a mother, a wife and wherever she goes she puts all of her heart into what’s she doing.

We talk a lot about how her life has lead her to become the writer she is and how she’s working each and every day to balance all of the important priorities that mean so much to her.

As a creator committed to bringing her stories to the world, I found her very inspring to chat to.

You can learn more about Maxine here:

Thanks to:

Podcast homepage – https://widtaabbqs.home.blog/

Ep3 – Sheree Strange

Sheree

Ep3. I’m learning folks.

Every time I sit down to record with someone I find out something new. In this episode, I’m grateful to some advice from soon-to-be guest, Jason Dibbs, for telling me to always have a Plan B when recording.

Today with Sheree there was a moment when I could have given up, could have said, ‘Sorry Sheree, this just isn’t going to happen in exactly the way I want it to.’

But that’s not what happened.

This is a podcast about people who find a way, despite the obstacles, no matter what it takes.

When I met up with Sheree we face background sound issues, memory card storage space issues and my own inexperience as a podcaster. We found a way though.

So around the 22, 23 minute mark of this pod when there’s a distinct change in the quality of audio, STICK WITH IT. What Sheree has to tell us is worth it.

Her story is filled with courage and commitment. She is not afraid to make bold moves in her life, to take a risk.

This is a great chat and I’m honoured that Sheree would share her stories with me.

Do it up.

 

You can catch up with Sheree and what’s she’s up to here:

Keeping up with the Penguins – http://keepingupwiththepenguins.com/

Twitter – @shereestrange

HuffPost – https://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/author/sheree-strange/

Medium – https://medium.com/@shereestrange

And, Sheree MCs each month @ https://www.facebook.com/thesydneypoetrylounge/

 

Thanks to:

eight and a half for “Piece by Piece” – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-U_MC4mabNM

Tara Ward for the art and design – http://www.tarawardphotography.com.au/

 

Podcast homepage – https://widtaabbqs.home.blog/